Saturday, June 09, 2007
summer time
it's beautiful.
john and i are getting settled into sunflower (slowly but surely - i should be putting massive amounts of laundry in right now, but i'm writing here instead). my favorite part of being married so far is sleeping next to my husband every night and waking up with him right there every morning.
we're loving this life. we have basically the whole summer to rest and relax and recuperate from last semester. the routine has become john getting up at 8:30 or 9 in the morning, making breakfast for himself and i (if i want it) and then he plays video games and relaxes while i sleep for another hour or so. it's absolutely beautiful.
can i say, though, that i am getting restless. not restless in my marriage, not at all. restless in the States. i haven't spent an entire year without flying overseas since 2004. i long to be somewhere other than here, knowing full well that this is exactly where i'm supposed to be. jen and linds just left today to go visit Megan - they're going to the Netherlands and Italy and Germany - and i long to be with them, but i'm so blessed to be here. i long to be with Matt and Heather in Myanmar, but it's so good to be here.
i'm torn.
and i love it.
it's so exciting, because it's more confirmation that here is not where i'm supposed to be. more confirmation that God is calling john and i out of the US for at least a time to love and serve Him and His people wherever it is that He's calling us. and that's wonderful. and that gives me peace.
so, for this summer, i'm going to go. i'm going overseas. in my prayers (thanks Corey!). i'm excited to be a part of the ministry going on all over the world through prayer and through updates via the internet. i'm excited to hopefully meet some of these people we're praying for this summer at debrief in Florida in July as well as see my family at NMSI.
i'm also excited to be around Illinois to establish my family and be here for the Kelly's and the Turner's and my family here in Springfield. I'm excited to be able to go to my goddaughter's first birthday party on July 5th and get to see her more times than that this summer.
and i'm thrilled to be living in Sunflower with my husband and that we have the entire summer to figure this whole living together thing out. it's working out great so far. we say at least once a day how great our marriage is. and it's true. God is richly blessing us. and we are so thankful.
~peace
john and i are getting settled into sunflower (slowly but surely - i should be putting massive amounts of laundry in right now, but i'm writing here instead). my favorite part of being married so far is sleeping next to my husband every night and waking up with him right there every morning.
we're loving this life. we have basically the whole summer to rest and relax and recuperate from last semester. the routine has become john getting up at 8:30 or 9 in the morning, making breakfast for himself and i (if i want it) and then he plays video games and relaxes while i sleep for another hour or so. it's absolutely beautiful.
can i say, though, that i am getting restless. not restless in my marriage, not at all. restless in the States. i haven't spent an entire year without flying overseas since 2004. i long to be somewhere other than here, knowing full well that this is exactly where i'm supposed to be. jen and linds just left today to go visit Megan - they're going to the Netherlands and Italy and Germany - and i long to be with them, but i'm so blessed to be here. i long to be with Matt and Heather in Myanmar, but it's so good to be here.
i'm torn.
and i love it.
it's so exciting, because it's more confirmation that here is not where i'm supposed to be. more confirmation that God is calling john and i out of the US for at least a time to love and serve Him and His people wherever it is that He's calling us. and that's wonderful. and that gives me peace.
so, for this summer, i'm going to go. i'm going overseas. in my prayers (thanks Corey!). i'm excited to be a part of the ministry going on all over the world through prayer and through updates via the internet. i'm excited to hopefully meet some of these people we're praying for this summer at debrief in Florida in July as well as see my family at NMSI.
i'm also excited to be around Illinois to establish my family and be here for the Kelly's and the Turner's and my family here in Springfield. I'm excited to be able to go to my goddaughter's first birthday party on July 5th and get to see her more times than that this summer.
and i'm thrilled to be living in Sunflower with my husband and that we have the entire summer to figure this whole living together thing out. it's working out great so far. we say at least once a day how great our marriage is. and it's true. God is richly blessing us. and we are so thankful.
~peace
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
update
sooo....Iles is a gifted school. that explains the gap in the low-income rates, but it still is interesting to me that 6 blocks down from Feitshans, there is an entirely different world in that building.
wow.
~peace
wow.
~peace
Monday, February 19, 2007
6 blocks
i drove a different way home from school today. i went by a school that i'd never seen before, so after searching and searching through all the district elementary schools, i finally figured out it was Iles Elementary. Iles is on the same street as Feitshan's Academy and six blocks down 15th street.
six blocks
six blocks is what separates a 95% low-income rate from a 24% low-income rate. Iles' low-income rate is smaller than my dinky po-dunk little hometown. and it's six blocks away from a school where 95 out of 100 students are at a disadvantage because they can't get their hands on materials that would aid them in being successful in school.
today was President's Day. most schools in the nation didn't meet today and teachers and students alike enjoyed their day off thanks to the honoring of our nation's presidents. however, i'm student teaching at a school in Springfield...so we got last Monday off, instead, honoring Abe Lincoln's birthday. today, we got to go to school and sit through some professional development. it was a pretty amazing day, really.
one thing we talked about today was classroom libraries and the importance of having one adequate for our kids to become successful readers. we talked about how some kids don't have the opportunity to read at home, and that makes it that much more important for them to be reading at school. we also talked about how good it is to have the opportunity for children to take home books, if for a period of time (1 or 2 weeks) or for them to have. it was stated that sometimes the books the children receive at Feitshan's may be the only book they have to call their own.
this astounds me.
as i was driving home, i was considering how many books i had growing up. my library was probably bigger than the library in the classroom where i am now. no joke. and these kids might not have one book to call their own.
it made me want to cry and throw up all at the same time.
we also talked about culture today. we were presented with two family situations. i won't type them out here, but they were vastly different, i can tell you that much. one was a middle class, American family. the other originated from Brazil where mothers basically choose which of their children will live or die because their living conditions are so poor that the babies that they have who are weak will not survive. they deploy what's called "maternal detachment" so it doesn't hurt as much and is essentially a survival strategy. this story also made me sick, to a point.
why are people living in conditions such as these when i'm living in wealth? i have more than i need - more really than i want. i get frustrated that i have so much and that i don't know what to do with it. i know i can't change the world and equal the playing field for the entire world on my own, but i wish some days that i could.
ok, so i'm done for tonight. it's almost my bedtime (it's not even 10 pm...). that's a whole nother story, though...it's weird to be old and have to get up early every morning. oh well, such is life. :)
~peace.
six blocks
six blocks is what separates a 95% low-income rate from a 24% low-income rate. Iles' low-income rate is smaller than my dinky po-dunk little hometown. and it's six blocks away from a school where 95 out of 100 students are at a disadvantage because they can't get their hands on materials that would aid them in being successful in school.
today was President's Day. most schools in the nation didn't meet today and teachers and students alike enjoyed their day off thanks to the honoring of our nation's presidents. however, i'm student teaching at a school in Springfield...so we got last Monday off, instead, honoring Abe Lincoln's birthday. today, we got to go to school and sit through some professional development. it was a pretty amazing day, really.
one thing we talked about today was classroom libraries and the importance of having one adequate for our kids to become successful readers. we talked about how some kids don't have the opportunity to read at home, and that makes it that much more important for them to be reading at school. we also talked about how good it is to have the opportunity for children to take home books, if for a period of time (1 or 2 weeks) or for them to have. it was stated that sometimes the books the children receive at Feitshan's may be the only book they have to call their own.
this astounds me.
as i was driving home, i was considering how many books i had growing up. my library was probably bigger than the library in the classroom where i am now. no joke. and these kids might not have one book to call their own.
it made me want to cry and throw up all at the same time.
we also talked about culture today. we were presented with two family situations. i won't type them out here, but they were vastly different, i can tell you that much. one was a middle class, American family. the other originated from Brazil where mothers basically choose which of their children will live or die because their living conditions are so poor that the babies that they have who are weak will not survive. they deploy what's called "maternal detachment" so it doesn't hurt as much and is essentially a survival strategy. this story also made me sick, to a point.
why are people living in conditions such as these when i'm living in wealth? i have more than i need - more really than i want. i get frustrated that i have so much and that i don't know what to do with it. i know i can't change the world and equal the playing field for the entire world on my own, but i wish some days that i could.
ok, so i'm done for tonight. it's almost my bedtime (it's not even 10 pm...). that's a whole nother story, though...it's weird to be old and have to get up early every morning. oh well, such is life. :)
~peace.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
snow day...yay?
so, this is the least excited i've ever been about a snow day. i was supposed to start student teaching today - i even didn't sleep well because i was excited/nervous/didn't know if we'd even have school. now, i'm still in my bed because my teacher called me and left me a message.
i'm going back to sleep.
~peace
i'm going back to sleep.
~peace
Thursday, February 01, 2007
i read Luke 4 this morning. i made a decision that i would read whatever i opened up to, and that's where i landed.
every time before this when i've read this passage about the temptation of Jesus, i've just been amazed at how well Jesus knew the Scriptures. today, it either hit me harder or in a different way or something.
you see, it's been kind of a dry spell between me and the Word. God's been gently working in me for a week or so. first, He took me to James 1. i relearned that when you doubt God, His Word, and His timing, you are tossed about like waves in the sea. that's what i've felt like for a while now, and frankly, i'm getting tired of it...not just tired of it, but tired in general.
and then He took me to Luke this morning - and lovingly retaught the lesson of how incredibly important it is to know the Word and have it hidden away in your heart to fight the enemy.
how amazing is it that the God we serve keeps reteaching those lessons that we always seem to forget?
~peace
every time before this when i've read this passage about the temptation of Jesus, i've just been amazed at how well Jesus knew the Scriptures. today, it either hit me harder or in a different way or something.
you see, it's been kind of a dry spell between me and the Word. God's been gently working in me for a week or so. first, He took me to James 1. i relearned that when you doubt God, His Word, and His timing, you are tossed about like waves in the sea. that's what i've felt like for a while now, and frankly, i'm getting tired of it...not just tired of it, but tired in general.
and then He took me to Luke this morning - and lovingly retaught the lesson of how incredibly important it is to know the Word and have it hidden away in your heart to fight the enemy.
how amazing is it that the God we serve keeps reteaching those lessons that we always seem to forget?
~peace
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
laughter through tears
i think that the most amazing laughter comes through tears. i think that i just realized this. there was a moment in this past week where two of my closest and dearest friends and i were all sitting on a bed. we all ended up crying. in that moment of us all crying, healing finally came and we all embraced and started laughing through our tears. the tears turned to tears of joy and of understanding and recognizing our need for one another.
that laughter - i need that laughter. just like i need those girls. just like i need all of my brothers and sisters that God has so blessed my life with.
transitions are scary sometimes. well, most of the time. transitions imply moving into an unknown. and that's exactly where we three girls sat a few nights ago. on the brink of our final semester as students at UIS, with changes in all of our lives happening so quickly that we can hardly take it in.
this semester is going to be amazing. i can't wait to see what God does through it all. hopefully i can open up enough to allow Him to work.
that laughter - i need that laughter. just like i need those girls. just like i need all of my brothers and sisters that God has so blessed my life with.
transitions are scary sometimes. well, most of the time. transitions imply moving into an unknown. and that's exactly where we three girls sat a few nights ago. on the brink of our final semester as students at UIS, with changes in all of our lives happening so quickly that we can hardly take it in.
this semester is going to be amazing. i can't wait to see what God does through it all. hopefully i can open up enough to allow Him to work.
Saturday, December 09, 2006
somewhere over the rainbow
i was asked recently to sing a song...any song that was important to me - that meant a lot to me. i had no idea what to sing - my mind went blank for a second, and then one just appeared.
it was "over the rainbow"
it's a song of my childhood - Wizard of Oz was one of my favorite movies (right up there with Willy Wonka).
it's a song of my summer in Russia - when i asked for a rainbow, when i felt so close to God because that prayer (and another) was answered just a few moments later.
it's a song of my present and ever longing for Home
Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?
God has turned a childhood favorite into so much more.
~peace
it was "over the rainbow"
it's a song of my childhood - Wizard of Oz was one of my favorite movies (right up there with Willy Wonka).
it's a song of my summer in Russia - when i asked for a rainbow, when i felt so close to God because that prayer (and another) was answered just a few moments later.
it's a song of my present and ever longing for Home
Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?
God has turned a childhood favorite into so much more.
~peace
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
randomness
40 weeks
watch Stranger than Fiction - it's an awesome story
i've come to terms with the fact that i don't use Outlook's calendar, but i have taken to e-mailing myself important things to remember (like lunch appointments or to turn in my timesheet tomorrow) and then flagging them
yeah, it's in Outlook, too, but it's just not in the calendar...not traditional, but it works for me!
it's that time of year - when everyone is procrastinating and sending random, crazy e-mails. if you're not getting them, let me know, i'll forward...they're hilarious.
Jesus is amazing
peace
watch Stranger than Fiction - it's an awesome story
i've come to terms with the fact that i don't use Outlook's calendar, but i have taken to e-mailing myself important things to remember (like lunch appointments or to turn in my timesheet tomorrow) and then flagging them
yeah, it's in Outlook, too, but it's just not in the calendar...not traditional, but it works for me!
it's that time of year - when everyone is procrastinating and sending random, crazy e-mails. if you're not getting them, let me know, i'll forward...they're hilarious.
Jesus is amazing
peace
Sunday, November 05, 2006
how many times?
the cross before me, the world behind
NO TURNING BACK, raise the banner high...
how many times do i have to sing that? how many times before i actually don't turn back?
my cry tonight is that i cry it every second of every day. i don't want to turn back anymore. i want to run into the arms of Someone kinder.
more alli rogers' lyrics...
it's hard to be a mother
and it's hard to be a woman
and it's hard to live in Africa sometimes
it's hard to be amother
and it's hard to be a woman
and it's hard to live in America sometimes
Someday, i will wake
In a body that won't break
On ground that doesn't shake
Not here
Someday i will live
in a house that's built by
Hands that hold the world
Hands that hold the world
there is hope.
~peace
NO TURNING BACK, raise the banner high...
how many times do i have to sing that? how many times before i actually don't turn back?
my cry tonight is that i cry it every second of every day. i don't want to turn back anymore. i want to run into the arms of Someone kinder.
more alli rogers' lyrics...
it's hard to be a mother
and it's hard to be a woman
and it's hard to live in Africa sometimes
it's hard to be amother
and it's hard to be a woman
and it's hard to live in America sometimes
Someday, i will wake
In a body that won't break
On ground that doesn't shake
Not here
Someday i will live
in a house that's built by
Hands that hold the world
Hands that hold the world
there is hope.
~peace
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
it's November?
does anyone else ever have days when they just think about the past? i don't know what it is about today and the fact that i'm sitting in my 2 o'clock classroom 30 minutes before class starts (and i've been here for 15 minutes already) and the desire to think about the past.
usually, i start with my past education. i don't know why, maybe it's the teacher in me. but there are days when i just go to District 186's website and look at the Hamilton High and Elementary websites for awhile. today, i was astonished to find out a very interesting fact:
DOC ISN'T TEACHING ANYMORE.
ok, so that doesn't mean probably anything to probably anyone that reads this blog. however, let me explain. well, first, let's start with Shorty. Shorty (usually known as Mr Short) was my favorite math teacher in high school. he is amazing. he not only taught me about algebra, geometry and statistics, but he also taught me about life. he was the most understanding teacher when my grandpa died and then again when a kid i graduated with passed away. i was in his room, crying, after both events. Shorty (sometimes referred to as "Buddha") left Hamilton a few years ago. he's now teaching in a neighboring school district (yes, it's true, i just went to their website to make sure that he's still teaching). When Shorty left Hamilton, i knew that it was going to be a great blow to the district - he'd been there for years and years.
Doc was the other math teacher when i was in high school. Doc also taught at least one, if not both, of my parents at Hamilton High School. he wasn't my favorite, but he was Doc. Doc loves the St Louis Blues and taught me much about teaching and different teaching styles (as much about that, if not more, than about algebra and advanced math).
this is kind of a ridiculous post, but i had time and i wanted to share with you all my astonishment. now that i think about it, i might have known that Doc was planning on retiring, or that he did, even.
it's crazy to look back on life and see where we've been, though. at least it is for me. i had no idea where i would be today when i walked the hallways of Hamilton High School. and i have no idea where i'll be three to five years from now, either.
it's a crazy ride. i'm glad i'm not in control.
peace
usually, i start with my past education. i don't know why, maybe it's the teacher in me. but there are days when i just go to District 186's website and look at the Hamilton High and Elementary websites for awhile. today, i was astonished to find out a very interesting fact:
DOC ISN'T TEACHING ANYMORE.
ok, so that doesn't mean probably anything to probably anyone that reads this blog. however, let me explain. well, first, let's start with Shorty. Shorty (usually known as Mr Short) was my favorite math teacher in high school. he is amazing. he not only taught me about algebra, geometry and statistics, but he also taught me about life. he was the most understanding teacher when my grandpa died and then again when a kid i graduated with passed away. i was in his room, crying, after both events. Shorty (sometimes referred to as "Buddha") left Hamilton a few years ago. he's now teaching in a neighboring school district (yes, it's true, i just went to their website to make sure that he's still teaching). When Shorty left Hamilton, i knew that it was going to be a great blow to the district - he'd been there for years and years.
Doc was the other math teacher when i was in high school. Doc also taught at least one, if not both, of my parents at Hamilton High School. he wasn't my favorite, but he was Doc. Doc loves the St Louis Blues and taught me much about teaching and different teaching styles (as much about that, if not more, than about algebra and advanced math).
this is kind of a ridiculous post, but i had time and i wanted to share with you all my astonishment. now that i think about it, i might have known that Doc was planning on retiring, or that he did, even.
it's crazy to look back on life and see where we've been, though. at least it is for me. i had no idea where i would be today when i walked the hallways of Hamilton High School. and i have no idea where i'll be three to five years from now, either.
it's a crazy ride. i'm glad i'm not in control.
peace
